What happens when one of your best donors gives far more to another nonprofit? These major donor stewardship strategies can help your organization move beyond frustration, learn what influenced the gift, and build stronger opportunities for future investment.
On this Fundraisers Friday conversation, Julia C. Patrick and Tony Beall confront a painful fundraising reality: a donor may care about your mission, possess considerable giving capacity, and still make their transformational or legacy gift somewhere else!
The wrong response is indignation. The stronger business response is curiosity, gratitude, and an honest review of the donor relationship.
Tony advises nonprofit leaders to look beyond their internal database and understand a donor’s broader philanthropic activity. “Invest some time in really understanding the full profile of your donor, not just the profile that exists within your organization.”
That knowledge can reveal why another organization received the larger commitment. Perhaps there was a matching opportunity, a clearly defined project, a compelling future vision, or simply a direct invitation your nonprofit never extended.
The conversation also addresses a common fundraising weakness: under-asking. Rather than surprising a donor with an oversized request, Tony recommends testing the opportunity through language such as, “How would you feel if I asked you to double your investment?” This creates room for an honest response while connecting the proposed gift to measurable community impact.
Julia reinforces the importance of giving donors something meaningful to fund: “If we can get your investment, we can do this.” The discussion moves fundraising away from building organizational coffers and toward financing visible results.
The co-hosts also examine legacy gifts, balancing immediate fundraising needs with long-term sustainability, and handling donors who expect board influence in exchange for financial support.
Key Takeaways:
Study donors’ broader philanthropic activity, not only their history with your organization.
Celebrate gifts to peer nonprofits before asking what motivated the decision.
Connect larger requests to specific programs, outcomes, and people served.
Test donor readiness before presenting a formal major-gift request.
Discuss legacy giving with donors across a wider range of ages.
Use a written gift policy to prevent donations from becoming board-level pay-to-play arrangements.
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